When You Want to Be a Mary (Instead Of a Martha) But Life Is Overwhelming

Are you a Mary or Martha? You’ve probably heard or read that sermon, devotional, or online quiz more than once. Sometimes the most familiar Bible stories lose their potency. I confess that the most commonly quoted verses can cause me to zone out thinking, “been there, done that.”

One of the many amazing things about God is how he infuses fresh meaning into well-known phrases. That’s what he did one sunny spring afternoon as I swept my kitchen while listening to the words of Luke 10.

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:38-42 NIV

As I swept and listened, I thought back over the lessons I had learned at some point from the story of Mary and Martha:

When Jesus walks into the room, it makes sense to drop everything, go to him, and listen.
Chores and logistics aren’t as important as knowing Christ.
The menial work of this life is temporary, but Jesus is eternal.

I’m a mom to two little kids, a wife, a writer, and a friend—to name a few of my roles. I adore the idea of dropping everything and soaking in the presence of Jesus.

Still, I wonder.

How do I choose the better portion like Mary? How am I supposed to model this in everyday life?

Have you ever wondered the same?

Few Things

I try to picture myself as Martha. I’m busy. I’m tidying, preparing food, and readying the house for guests. It’s not a stretch.

Martha invites Jesus and his disciples into her home. With the Son of God sitting in her living room she “was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made.”

Mary decides to set aside the preparatory work and go sit at the feet of Jesus. Martha speaks up and asks, “‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!'”

I can imagine myself uttering those words or at the very least, thinking them.

“‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.'” (emphasis, mine)

Jesus tells Martha (and us) that only one thing is needed. What is that one thing?

Deprioritizing the work of hospitality?

Devaluing housework?

Neglecting the rumbling bellies?

An Answer in the Psalms

It just so happened that the day before, I’d been reading Psalm 27, penned by King David.

One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
Psalm 27:4 (emphasis mine), NIV

Our lives are full, for sure. What about David’s life? He ran from enemies, walked into wars, ruled a kingdom, and parented his children.

David faced distractions and overwhelming situations. So do you. So do I.

Even so, David asks one thing of the Lord—to be in his presence.

When my heart is united in the one desire of seeking God’s presence, tasks and responsibilities may fill my schedule, but underneath everything, peace flows like a river.

"When a heart is united in the one desire of seeking God's presence, tasks and responsibilities may fill the schedule, but underneath everything, peace will always flow like a river." Share on X

What Do You Desire?

When our hearts desire many things, we can fall into a state of worry, wondering if those desires will be fulfilled.

A heart united in the one desire for God’s presence can be confident to receive what it longs for.

“‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one‘” (Luke 10:41-42).

When I wash the dishes, I can offer gratitude knowing Jesus is with me even there. I can teach my children with an awareness of God’s presence. And I can go about my work with my heart’s desire placed squarely on knowing Christ more.

Work is good and given to us as a gift. Will we do our work seeing his presence in it? Or allow it to disrupt and upset our hearts?

Today, I’ll seek to unite my heart in one desire for God’s presence. Instead of worrying over my children’s futures or my success as a writer, mother, or homemaker, I’ll desire one thing: to “dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life” (Psalm 27:4).

Stop and ask whether your heart is divided and worried about many things or united in its desire for Christ’s presence. If you find it divided, pray. “Teach me your way, O LORD, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name” (Psalm 86:11, emphasis mine).

I’d love to know—how can you seek the the presence of the Lord today? Leave your idea in the comments!

*Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash