Words Matter and the Definition of This One Can Set You Free

My first job out of college was as a systems engineer for the Department of Defense. One of my projects involved working with a team to select a winning contract proposal. I worked closely with the senior engineer on the team for months. As we wrote and compiled monstrous-sized reports to justify our decisions, his attention to detail and careful word choice impressed me. He didn’t grow tired and gloss over a few pages. He never settled for “good enough” even if it meant working late hours. His standard of excellence set the bar high for the rest of the team.

A phrase he would say to me often throughout this process was, “Words matter.”

In our case, the words we read and the words we wrote meant the difference between one company’s successful acquisition of an important government contract and another company’s loss. He was right. They mattered.

His phrase stuck with me long after I left government work, and I’ve said it to myself and other people since then. Often it’s not a contract on the line but our hearts and our relationships.

Communication is the pathway to closeness in relationships, and each word we choose is a stone in that path.

Clarity of thought matters.

Definitions matter.

Words matter.

This is how we know others and allow ourselves to be known. Words enable us to understand God’s story in Scripture. And it is through words that we process and express our reactions, emotions, and responses. Picking the right words can make all the difference.

#Communication is the pathway to closeness in relationships, and each word we choose is a stone in that path. Clarity of thought matters. Definitions matter. Words matter. #wordsmatter Click To Tweet

Twisted Words

I recently finished watching The Vow documentary. If you haven’t heard of it, the series is an account of the NXVIM cult and its founder, Keith Reniere. I can’t say I recommend you watch it because it’s a heavy, dark story, but I mention it here because it shows the power words can wield over people.

As I watched the tactics and tools by which Keith controlled the people in his group, I noticed it all started with word definitions.

The group sat in a circle, and the speaker would ask a question like, “What is a lie anyway?” The people would look at each other with raised eyebrows and knowing nods.

Common questions asked by leaders of the group included: “What are you afraid of? What is fear? What is suffering?” The definitions provided to the group seemed to empower them. One former member reflected later that the group was trained to not trust their gut instincts and instead to push through fear, suffering, or nervousness.

All of us are susceptible to persuasion to some degree (or am I the only one to crave pizza after a commercial break?) but I found myself thinking how much more difficult it would be to confuse a student of the Bible in this way. The Bible presents us with solid definitions and concepts for words such as lie, right, wrong, joy, failure, and suffering.

Apart from the Bible, these words float untethered to any foundational truth and can be warped and twisted to fit man’s sinful desires.

Apart from the Bible, concepts like joy, suffering, right, and wrong float untethered to any foundational truth and can be warped and twisted to fit man’s sinful desires. #wordsmatter #truth Click To Tweet

The One That Can Set You Free

Freedom from sin comes through acceptance of the person and work of Jesus Christ, but I use the word “free” to refer to the burdens Christians often take on as we weigh ourselves down, consciously or not, with the cares of this world.

One of those cares comes with the label “success.” My story involves chasing after two definitions—the world’s and God’s. I believed I could do both. I wanted both. But no one can serve two masters. Eventually, tomorrow or in five year’s time, all of us hit a fork in the road, and the choice is one single path, not both.

“Success” in the secular realm is one of those floating, untethered words. It brings up different ideas for every individual. We are told we can create our own definition, but we remain acutely aware of the judgment passed on our version of success. Status, power, money, and relationships are a few of the ingredients that make up the socially-acceptable recipe of success.

The Bible’s Definition

As I think of how God defines success, several verses come to mind.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him [Eliab]. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

1 Samuel 16:7 ESV

God looks past the outward displays of success to see what is hidden in our hearts.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.

1 Corinthians 9:24-25

Paul uses an analogy, comparing a life of faithfulness to the Olympic games. Winners of the games receive a trophy that will rust, break, and be thrown away. It may look like success on the outside, but true success is found in following Jesus to lay hold of the imperishable treasures laid up in heaven. Speaking of treasure…

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21 ESV

God wants us to labor for that which is lasting and eternal.

This past summer our church went through a series about abiding in Jesus. As my pastor unpacked the passage, we came to the heart of the issue: to abide in Christ is to fulfill our purpose as God’s created beings. There is no more proper definition of success than a creation serving the purpose for which it has been created.

I hope you feel the relief that I feel, reader, because none of these Scriptures speak to our bank accounts, our followers on social media, or our beauty. We can stop striving, lay down these burdens we’ve heaped on our shoulders, and abide in Jesus to find success in God’s eyes.

There is no more proper definition of #success than a creation serving the purpose for which it has been created. Click To Tweet

A Time of Reflection and Vision-Casting

As we approach the end of another year, we come to a time when many of us reflect on the past and look forward to the future. We make plans, set goals, and dream big. As we examine our desires and vision for the new year, let’s also examine our motivations. Which definition is driving us?

When we devote ourselves to God and pursuing matters close to his heart, the result may be loss, grief, and sacrifice. It may also look from the outside a lot like the world’s definition of success. The difference is found in our hearts because regardless of the outcome, we find ultimate peace and fulfillment of purpose when we draw near to Him and allow ourselves to be conformed to the image of Christ.

This is the freedom I spoke of earlier.

Steadfastly rooted in faith and safe in God, regardless of the outcome of our devotion.

Committed to his purposes and unburdened by the standards of this world.

Empowered by Christ to do the impossible and remain content whatever the circumstances.

Words matter. Which definition of success are you living by? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!