What You Need to Know Before You Zone Out: The Truth About Mental Rest

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A few years ago, I developed a go-to routine after the kids were in bed. I’d grab my phone, head for the couch, and play a game—one of those addictive apps with a million levels. I’d swipe and play for fifteen minutes before growing bored. At that point, I’d look up from the screen and sigh. It was a break, for sure, but did I feel better or more well-rested than when I began?

Around this same time, a woman from church invited me to attend a Christian-led hot yoga class. Seeing it as a chance to socialize and get out of the house, I said yes. I expected to work my body, but the side benefits showed up the next morning when I felt mentally lighter.

I puzzled over how this particular class could make me feel mentally rested and restored. Occasionally I’ll go for a run or use a strength-training app, so I knew the reason couldn’t be solely attributed to exercise.

And then I realized.

For an hour, I had focused intently on not falling over (in addition to the normal yoga stuff like holding correct posture and continuing to breathe). My brain was devoted to this singular task and counterintuitively found rest from turning over thoughts about to-do lists and daily responsibilities. 

This seemed counter-intuitive. I’d always associated rest with stillness. In this day and age, when more of our work is driven by thought and creativity than by physical might, we often deplete our minds before our bodies. And yet, I hadn’t given much thought to the idea of finding mental rest.

Watching tv or scrolling social media can camouflage itself as rest because we see the same phenomena at play—our mental focus is consumed by an activity that allows us to escape from the problems and mundane duties of real life. 

What if, after a long day of weeding the garden or organizing the house, we laid down to sleep on a concrete floor? Or tried to sleep with lights on and music playing? Would we rest? Well, technically, yes. We could still our bodies and maybe even fall asleep, but I, for one, wouldn’t wake the next morning feeling refreshed. 

And yet, we often approach mental rest with a belief that any activity allowing us to escape or zone out is sufficient. But after working so diligently for so long, our minds crave quality rest too.

The Goal of Rest

One reason to rest is spiritual. It reminds us that we are not God. When we rest, we declare to ourselves and the world that we can cease our striving and stop working because God is in control. And we are not. 

Secondly, God prescribes rest as a means of gathering strength to continue the journey. This is why it’s important to notice how we feel after we’ve engaged in what we believe is a restful activity. It’s not one-size-fits-all. Some feel rested after exercise, others feel invigorated after a creative activity, and some need time to read and write. And some will feel rested after watching tv or scrolling Instagram. 

Self-awareness about our energy levels and emotions help us see which activities help and which hinder. If your restful activity of choice isn’t providing the refreshment you need, it may be time for a switch.

Self-Defeating Breaks

Whichever activity we choose as a mental outlet, evaluating our thought-lives will give us clues about what’s working and what’s not. If you read last week’s post on breaking a tv habit, you’ll know that for me, trying to rest by engaging technology doesn’t work.

I was attempting to lay down anxiety and weariness at the altar of technology rather than at the feet of Jesus. I’m sure you can guess—it didn’t work out.

For many, engaging in social media or entertainment to find rest can make the problem worse. 

An article from Northwestern Medicine says that “watching back-to-back episodes of your favorite show may excite your brain, and as a result, interferes with your ability to sleep. Squeezing in just one more episode can cause you to stay up late at night, leaving you feeling tired and drained the next day.”

And when it comes to social media, McLean Hospital confirms what we already know to be true: “The platforms are designed to be addictive and are associated with anxiety, depression, and even physical ailments.”

So while we know the trick to mental relaxation includes switching focus, we need to carefully consider what types of content we give our attention to. 

Three Questions Worth Asking

If you’re unsure whether the activities you turn to during a mid-afternoon break or evening routine are helpful or hurtful, try asking yourself these three questions.

1. Does the activity interfere with my sanctification? God is working in the heart of every Christian to make him or her more like Christ. One way to live out God’s will for us is by avoiding that which makes us look more like the world. 

2. Does it inspire gratitude and faith in God or foster feelings of anxiety, comparison, and depression? Maybe you’ve noticed that after watching a certain show, looking at a particular Instagram account, or reading one genre of novels, you feel further from God. Taking a mental break does not look like escaping from God. We still depend on his mercy and grace, even in our rest.

3. Do I procrastinate or completely avoid walking through hard emotions or circumstances in my real life? This one hits home for me personally. When I feel upset or stressed, my go-to reaction is to seek escape. But, really, if I dig down deeper, I find a lack of belief—belief that God will go with me through the valley. If he’s taught me anything this past year, it’s this: his presence with me through the trial is far better than escaping hardship and missing out on how he wants to grow, comfort, and guide me through the thick of it. God’s rest doesn’t close the blinds and ignore the realities of life. But it does equip us to see he is present and always in control.

If you’re unsure whether the activities you turn to during a mid-afternoon break or evening routine are helpful or hurtful, try asking yourself these three questions. #mentalrest #godsrest #takeabreak Click To Tweet

How I Broke My TV Habit—3 Steps

In last week’s post, I told you I’d share how I broke my tv habit. Here are the simple three steps that worked in my life.

1. I Took a Trip

Changing the environment can make us reexamine and question even the most mundane details of our daily rhythms. Right now, at the beginning of summer, you may have your own vacation on the books. It’s a prime opportunity to kickstart a new habit or replace a well-worn one. And even if you don’t have a vacation to rely on, the beginning of summer often changes up our normal routines. You can use the transition time to sweep out the old and bring in the new.

2. I Prepared Myself With an Alternative

I went prepared with an alternative—reading novels. Reading is one of my favorite ways to find mental rest. It invites me into new lands, homes, and characters’ minds and causes me to focus solely on the story in front of me. As with tv, I have to be careful with the types of content I’m consuming. I run it past the three questions above, and sometimes that means I quit a book part-way through or decide to delete a title from my to-be-read list because its themes and scenes will be a hindrance rather than a help to my walk with the Lord.

My husband used to work as a classroom teacher, and he taught me that a habit or behavior isn’t easily eliminated. It has to be replaced with a good habit or behavior. Reading may not be your favorite, but find something easily accessible and life-giving that can be your new go-to activity for mental rejuvenation. Some ideas: calling a friend on the actual phone, a few minutes of stretching, or listening to music or a podcast.

3. I Created a New Cue

I attached my new habit of reading to the behaviors that used to trigger my desire for tv-watching. Greg McKeown talks about this method in his book Essentialism. “Every habit is made up of a cue, a routine, and a reward. The cue is a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and which habit to use. Then there is the routine—the behavior itself—which can be physical or mental or emotional. Finally, there is a reward, which helps your brain figure out if this particular habit is worth remembering for the future.”

My cues included sitting down to lunch, resting for a moment on the couch, or discovering my kiddos were occupied so that I had a few moments to myself. Those cues would have me stretching my finger toward the Netflix app. After determining how and why I wanted to change my habit, the cues reminded me to open the Kindle app or my “To Read” notebook in Evernote instead. My reward came through knowing that I was feeding my mind and soul with the written word rather than depleting my mental stores by watching tv. Over time, the habit stuck.

Bonus tip for kids!

I recently discovered Wonderbooks at our local library. If you’re looking for an engaging alternative to screen time, give these a try. The books contain speakers and playback buttons that easily allow children to control the audio recording. Think audiobooks without the hassle of headphones and a separate device (although you can definitely use headphones with them). My husband also recently started recording himself reading some of our children’s books and storing the audio files on an old iPod. I’m amazed at how long my three-year-old will sit with a book flipping through the pages again and again.

Don’t Forget

As I close, I want to return to the reason any of this matters in the first place. Because, really, if it doesn’t matter then let’s all go home and binge a few seasons of the latest show, right? But it does matter because our calling is to know God, to make him known, and to glorify him with our lives. Living in light of eternity means that even the small details, like how I spend my break time, matter in a way that’s bigger than myself.

Resting well is about living life to the fullest, but that’s not all it’s about. It’s about living in a way that honors the Lord with my time and energy and that shows others a treasure more valuable than anything the world can offer.

If I can offer one last encouragement, it would be this—if you feel like you’re not currently resting well and you’re seeking to escape and dull your senses—focus on Jesus, not the shortcoming or the quick-fix solution. Galatians 5:22-23 tells us, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Self-control comes by the Spirit as we depend on him. As we seek God and follow his ways, we can rest in the knowledge that he is faithful to complete his work in us.

Looking for More?

Here are a few additional resources on the topic of rest to check out.

1. The Rest Quiz (find out what type of rest you need right now!)
2. The Secret to Rest (article)
3. Sand Between Your Toes: Inspirations for a Slower, Simpler, and More Soulful Life (book)
4. Rhythms of Rest: Finding the Spirit of Sabbath in a Busy World (book)
5. Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity (book)

Lastly, be sure to download your free guide, “Fighting for Self Care: A Faith-Based Approach to Creating Space for Your Mind and Soul.” It identifies common unhelpful habits we turn to in times of boredom, stress, or exhaustion, and it will give you ideas for what to do instead!